Shut Your Piehole–Todd’s First Post!
The other day no less than five people felt it necessary to burden me with every detail of how life has done them wrong. The presumption is that THEIR life sucks more than mine. I love these five people. But, in these tense and troubling times, I wish they would take my simple advice and Shut Your Piehole.
Got small, irritating things in your life? Do what I do, keep your mouth shut. No one wants to hear it! If everyone in the world unloaded on everybody who asked, “hey, how are you doing?” the world would come to a screeching halt.
I mean, really! “My sister said this…” “My dry cleaner did that…” The complainers want only one thing–and that is for you to say, “I’m so sorry, your life sucks!” Which is pretty presumptuous, seeing that YOURS might suck more. Be aware that telling the story of the horrific experience you had at the BMW dealer might currently being told to a person who bought just enough gas to get to work with the loose change they scavenged from their sock drawer.
I believe that we are measured by the things we cherish and love, and not by the things that annoy us. At a party, you might point out someone and say “that’s Bob, he loves cooking, has a St. Bernard and lived in Japan for four years.” You wouldn’t say, “that’s Bob, he hates it when people park too close to his driveway, he’s lactose intolerant and his copier toner costs $43.00 a shot.”
Think positively! It’s like our mothers used to say, “if you don’t have something nice to say, shut the HELL UP!” We are ALL under stress–money, our jobs, the future. The last thing we need is you showing up looking like the iceburg that sank the Titanic. Please think about what you’re about to say. If you’re going to complain, remember that everyone’s in the same boat and that most have bigger problems to attend to.
Think about it. I hope to have an uplifting discussion with you soon.
Todd
There, But For the Grace of God Go I…
Editor’s note: this is first in line for my new greeting cards series: “Wow! Your Life Sucks! My Five Year Old Heart Weeps For You!”
So, one of the moms at our school fundraising meeting last night passed me a card and squeezed my hand, whispering (lips compressed with emotion) “this reminded me of you.” I thanked her and read it in the car on the way home. The gist of the card is “Wow, everytime I think my life sucks, I remember you and I feel SO much better!” I laughed so hard that I nearly wet myself (so, you can tell that it was a really, really funny card or I forgot to do my Kegels again.)
Our family has some fairly intense health challenges. Not worth addressing because EVERY family has intense challenges of one sort or another. But the whole philosophy of “I get cheered up when I think about how many people have it SO much worse that I do” has always creeped me out. That’s not empathy. That’s just another tiresome round of one-upmanship. Why am I supposed to feel better about my grief and anxiety by knowing that others are suffering more?
I remember hosting an MS telethon in Washington DC–one of the hosts was a great guy in a wheelchair, obviously battling the disease. Some random US Senator put a fatherly hand on his shoulder and exhorted viewers to donate by saying “there, but for the Grace of God go I.” This host was charming, a successful human-rights lawyer and married to an insanely hot woman. So that made the comment not only condescending but ludicrous. He looked up at my aghast expression and said “yeah, that one never gets old.”
I like Viktor Frankl’s views better. He wrote “Man’s Search For Meaning” about his experiences in the Nazi concentration camps in World War Two. He theorized that when we endure great loss or challenges, we join a human pool of suffering that is meant to expand our love and empathy to others. Not in a “your life is so crappy that I feel better about mine” way but in a “I feel what you feel and share my love and comfort with you.”
Whatever’s going on in your life right now that causes you to pace the floors at night…that makes you cry when you think no one’s looking? I can’t fix it. But please feel my arms around you and know that I share your grief. Maybe sharing will make the burden lighter for us both.
Today’s Free Offer
Daily Worth--I'm a big believer in women taking charge of their own financial destiny. Here's free tips, ideas and education delivered daily to your inbox.
Food On The Table
So, get this--Food on the Table is a FREE service that'll help you put together your weekly menu plan, post the needed recipes, create a shopping list and THEN scour the 'Net for coupons to download for your shopping list. I'm getting misty...sniff..
DoggyLoot
It's like Groupon...but for dogs!
Make Money At Home
Win A $5,000 Home Theatre Package!
Ready To Coupon?
"Extreme Couponing" on TLC has done one thing for all us would-be frugalistas--while no one I know wants to be quite that crazed, couponing is looking more attractive, am I right? Here's your coupon options in a tidy, almost shamefully easy format:
Cellfire loads coupons directly to your card. Scan that bad boy at checkout--no clipping!
Coupons.com, hands-down my favorite for ease of navigation and big fat coupons. You'll need to download a toolbar to print. Do not fear the toolbar, it will bring you many goodies.
Coupon Deals Daily.com offers 50-90% off items locally available. Worth checking often, since nothing lasts for long.
So, "catalinas" are the slips of paper-style coupons you get at checkout along with your reciept to use for next time. Print them on Coupon Network.com, and use them THIS trip. Clever you!
No insurance? Or does your lousy coverage refuse to pay for certain medications? Enter the Pharmacy Coupons--this network allows you to print coupons for up to 75% off your prescription costs. In the economy? A literal lifesaver.
Red Plum Coupons cover a huge variety--everything from grocery to your local tire store. Take a look around by clicking below.
Do you have estrogen? Then you will love Woman Freebies.com. They send free girly samplys and piles of high-value coupons. No catch!
Twitter Me!
Friend Me On Facebook
Pin Me!
